[microsound] software to 'maculate' sound

[Andrew Brouse]

Hello microsoundies,

I am looking for a tool to aid in the 'maculation' of all audio that  
enters my ears.
I am finding the immaculate quality of the sounds entering my ears  
recently to be unnerving - I am sure that 'someone' is up to  
'something'.

I have attempted to put insects directly into my ears but they just  
died.
It would be great to hear just the insect without any distractions  
such as human speech.

I have tried many polishing tools but nothing seems to do the trick.
Any help that anyone can offer to help me to solve my problem would  
be greatly appreciated.

I thank you copiously in advance,
Andrew